Welcome to b
Welcome to /b/. You're ours now. Here's what you can expect. You'll stay for a while, see a few threads, laugh a bit, and see a few odd things. You'll bookmark the place for further amusement. This is where it all begins. Before too long, you'll find yourself checking on 4chan in increased frequencies. First it'll happen occasionally during the week. Then once every day or so. Then more frequently. You'll find yourself checking on it twice a day. Three times. Once per hour. Before you know it, you'll be browsing it for hours at a time. Slowly, your life will take a back-seat to /b/. You'll find yourself forgetting to call people. You'll be late for work because you'll be reading legendary threads. Slowly, your life will decline into a mindless chaos. As /b/ and 4chan slowly consume your mind, your humor will be replaced with our humor. You'll become glued to /b/. It'll be the only place you feel accepted. And then, you'll start accepting the weirder conventions. You'll find yourself fapping to loli, furry, guro, and all sorts of odd things you used to find disgusting. But now it'll all be commonplace for you, as a normal part of your life. Your personality. And then, someday down the road, you'll realize what has happened to you. Your loved ones will have left you. You'll be alone. Unemployed. Struggling to survive. And worst of all, you'll be hooked. You won't be able to fight it, because we will be all you know, and all you remember. You'll slowly dissolve into madness, or mindless stupidity. Whichever comes first. And then, one day, you will snap, and all remains of your former self will be crushed under our weight. Welcome, my friend. Welcome, my /b/rother. Welcome to your new home. Welcome to /b/.