- Philosophy of Life - what in life is worth having and a strategy for obtaining it
- Framing Effect - how we characterize a situation has a profound impact on how we respond to it emotionally
- the Stoics' goal was not to banish emotion but to minimize the number of negative emotions
- emotional cost of setbacks is far greater than the physical costs
- getting frustrated begets anger which is incompatible with happiness
- victim label is easy to accept because it relieves one of personal responsibility and entitles him to special treatment
- resilient people refuse the victim role, they don't want pity and don't regard themselves as pitiful beings
- setback free childhood creates emotionally brittle kids and deprives them of the chance to develop resilience
- Anchoring Effect - a cognitive bias whereby an individual's decisions are influenced by a particular reference point or 'anchor'
- Negative Visualization - periodically have flickering thoughts (don't dwell) about how our lives and circumstances could be worse
- anger is exhausting, it triggers anger in others, and it can cloud our judgment
- Stoic would skip the first four Kubler-Ross's five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression) and go directly to acceptance
- blame frame - assumes that you have been wronged, that some person or group of people has it in for you
- Stoics recommend that when we experience a setback, we make a point of consciously framing it as a kind of test
- with the right framing, you can turn the setbacks you experience into vehicles for self-transformation
- after we experience a setback, our first priority should be to prevent ourselves from being flooded by negative emotions
- successfully overcoming challenges will make you more confident, improve your ability to spot the silver linings, and appreciate just how relatively setback-free your life is
- tranquil life - experiencing as few negative emotions and as much delight as possible
- not even attempting to do something because of fear of failure is much worse than failing to do something difficult
- familiarity breeds comfort - do something scary often enough, and it not only ceases to be scary, it becomes automatic
- the goal of toughness training is not to let you live in uninterrupted comfort but to expand your comfort zone so you remain comfortable in a wider range of circumstances
- experiencing too much comfort will reduce your capacity for experiencing pleasure
- Last-time Meditation - acknowledging that because you are mortal, there will be a last time for everything you do
- Prospective Retrospection - reflecting on the likelihood that at some point in the future, you will wish you could travel back in time to this very moment
- a Stoic's primary goal in life is to attain and then maintain tranquility
- Stoic principles:
- we should not concern ourseles with things we cannot control
- we should be socially useful - do what we can to help those around us have better relieves
- dying is the easy part of your Stoic exit exam; the challenge is to retain your equanimity